What is God’s greatest commandment? When He was asked this question He responded with this:
Matthew 22: 36-39 – ‘Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first & greatest commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.‘
I don’t know about you, but if that’s the case, I have some work to do. And ohhh boy, if we are to love our neighbor as we do ourselves? I’d better do a whole lot better than that. Because, the one person on this planet I have the most difficulty loving… is me. Why? Well, I see all my faults and shortcomings. I see all the things in my past I’ve messed up, my bad decisions, my insecurities. I see all the things about myself that I believe make me less worthy of love.
For me, this really seems to raise it’s ugly head when I’m trying to change something about myself for the better. Why is it when we’re struggling with a bad habit we’re desperately wanting to change, our failure feels like a character flaw? In my case, I’m thinking specifically about my health. I’ve struggled with weight issues all of my life. I’ve had a few successes over the years, but more failures than successes if I’m honest. Each time I fall back into my old habits I verbally and mentally beat myself up. Oh, the horrible things I say to me. I must be broken, flawed, the biggest loser on the planet that I can’t conquer this. If someone came to me looking for help or encouragement with this same problem, I’d be full of kind words. Vehemently reassuring them that they’re not at all flawed and that God loves them. Why can’t I be that kind to myself?
In 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7, Paul gives us God’s characteristics of love. It’s patient, kind, keeps no record of wrongs, etc. How can we obey God’s commandment of loving others if we can’t even learn how to love ourselves? God’s love is also unconditional isn’t it? He knows our every flaw, every sin, every thought. Yet, He still loves us and forgives us. Isn’t it vanity or even pride to think that we know better than God on this topic? The same loving God that says in Matthew 10:30 ‘but the very hairs of your head are all numbered.’. He who said in Jeremiah 1:5 ‘Even before I formed thee in the belly, I knew thee…’ .
We are called to love one another as Christ loves us. That’s a pretty tall order to fill. It’s so very difficult to get over our past. As humans, we automatically believe the negative stuff about ourselves and those things seem to play on an endless loop in our head… especially when we fail. The self-deprecating comments can be so harsh.
But like anything else, nothing gets conquered without God’s hand in it. So maybe the next time you’re headed down that road to self-loathing, try to pause and think. ‘Would I say these things to someone else?’ Remember to pray and ask for God’s help. Ask Him for the strength to give yourself the same grace you’d give to others in the same situation. The amazing grace that God gives you.
I know it’s not easy. Nothing worthwhile ever is. When you think about it, all that doubt and negativity doesn’t get planted there by God, does it? But I guarantee His enemy sure has a hand in it. I went to see my Dr. yesterday to get some help in conquering this and she had some parting words for me that really stuck and I believe apply here. She said ‘Don’t let the beast win.’ With God on our side, we can conquer that beast. And spoiler alert… God conquers all.
Psalms 136:14 – ‘I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.’